When you’re angry with me

I don’t take rejection very well It’s like when I lose my temper Nothing matters Cold like December I freeze over My idle hands empty as my mind becomes. Heavy and graceless And the tears won’t run It seems redundant. So the sun goes down on a frown, maybe the longest running. And whatever angry energy remains at 3 in the morning turns to sadness and full blown depression by five And rather than be in my feelings I’m scarcely alive having shut down and retreated as far as I can to hide away from my own heart

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Late Admission

I was on IG today when I realized what’s going on

It hit me why I never erased your number from my phone

I loved you once

I was into you but the truth it pisses me off because I thought

I moved on from you

Swore I did

Ignored your phone calls to prove it

But still it’s like you parked your car on my heart and never moved it

As soon as I see you with somebody smiling, It hits me

I never made you smile like that

And it gets me

because I think maybe I never knew you

or maybe I’m missing out on the new you

So I’m parading around like I’m the new black

Heart heavy with feelings I’m trying hold back

Never expected to be hung up like that

but your face is a trigger

Making me act distracted like I had no reaction

Can’t give you the satisfaction though that smile pervades my private place

my personal space

Making vivid memories that won’t erase

My conscious remote

I press fast forward

My mind tries to move me

My heart needs a lawyer

It’s guilty as ever of betraying me

I never got over you Iike I tried to believe

New Song Familiar Tune

New year
New fear
Old excuses, New uses
Wet tissues, Well tuned violins
Low on money but got some friends Some like sisters, brothers too
But others too sexy
Polar pull
Wanna be the opposite of the young me with no confidence
Action my providence
Perseverance is solving this global warming of my atmosphere
Cooling it off because it hot in here Running out of time to make moves Gotta just do something without having something to prove
Without worry about what the next person gon do
Just wanna show up and eyes light up like oh it’s you!
Happy that I’m breathing
Dreams living
Double teaming the harsh reality we living
Arms still open and giving
Never letting the doors of my heart close
Like opening the doors to the church and never turning up my nose
New year
New decision on a different note
And now a selection from the choir They know

Man In A Daydream

I’m a candle swiftly burning in the dark

That lil flicker is my

Heart

See it burning there so fiercely

I’m so sad about things I’ve never had

Feeling so silly about that

Yearning for the man who lit me

But alas we can’t have all that we want

And that really is no fun

Hope the sadness doesn’t kill me

Gently

 

He’s the one I always want to run into

The only one that I’m into

The only interesting preview

No channel changing there

Finding it strange

I’m reaching out for your fingertips

Dreaming of kissing those dreamy lips

Body so sweet it’s candy dipped

Is this love or is it trickery

Tell me

 

Because I been through a lot things

Got no plans to backtrack

But I see myself waiting on a stairway

Hoping he’ll come back

Just wanna see him walking by

With no explanation why

And maybe he’ll say hi to me

Of all the things to wish for

 

Is this love or this trickery?

Won’t somebody please tell me

 

I detect black magic

It’s so tragic and I’m so Juliet

I got the potion but I’m not sleep yet

Maybe if I go to sleep I’ll forget

That I ever saw him or wanted to call him

Because he’ll never come save me

 

I’m just some lady that he’ll never see

And if he sees me he’ll never speak

It’s a shame I find him so unique

It makes my outlook seem so bleak

 

My candle’s lit and burning

My heart is still yearning

Even if I only saw him in a daydream