What I am What I should be

I’m always getting anxiety about the forces that be trying to make me something that I’m not
But what if what I’m not is what I should be?
I’m always dreaming of apostrophes and sometimes I think they own me
Almighty dollar is what’s wrong with me
Bill paying prolongs the disease
I chase the flicker of the green that comes from machines hoping to see more green outside my window
All I ever notice is the dim light of daybreak and before I know it, night has swallowed me
My body aches and becomes heavy hoping for rest but I am one of many weary ones
I can’t afford to sleep
I guiltily nap on my days off feeling as though I’m missing something that might pay off
I neglect family for homework due
I drag into work
I drag into school
People say stay encouraged
What else can I do?
I just keep on going
I choose not to choose
And should I fall into blissful sleep
I hope it’s not all in vain and I wake up to that which I seek
And I really hope I have become what I should be

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